Twentieth Break, Cylus 2, Arc 720
The Lemon Messy, Egilrun, Scalvoris
It was colder than he had hoped it would be. Then again, when he had left the lodge with Carver and set out to find somewhere that might’ve been more welcoming to his body’s previous host, he had not expected to wind up in a place like this.
After the first place proved useless (he was told to leave before he even got his foot in the door) and the second followed suit, Laures had become largely unmotivated in their search. While he did his best not to show it too clearly, it was wearing him thin, being so… unwanted. He was no stranger to the feeling, as he had not exactly been wanted in his previous life either - but it was different. He had been wanted in other ways, even if not the ones he would have preferred, and it had still felt better than this. Better than being glared at and told to leave, better than almost getting thrown out of the only place they’d found true shelter in thus far. He might have been little more than an object in his previous life, something to use and discard, but now, he felt like even less. He felt like nothing. He wasn’t even good enough to be used.
He tried to remind himself, as one break stretched into two and they continued on their cold search, that it was not him that these people so disliked. He did not even know any of them, and they certainly didn’t know him. All of their opinions, their judgements, their perceptions - all of them were based entirely on a man he had replaced, and did not reflect what they might think of him should they give him the chance to show himself. But it still did not feel good, when his lover was greeted with such respectful, friendly delight, and he was met with a glare and a grunt. But it didn’t matter, or it wouldn’t, soon enough. The people here might not have cared for him, or for Iver, but he did not care for them either, and did not plan on sticking around regardless.
So it was a turbulent blend of relief and reluctance when they came upon the Lemon Messy. Odd though it was, Laures found some comfort in the fact that he could not be shoved out through a door, should this place turn out to be like the others. Besides, the walls - or, the… ship? Was it an upturned ship? It was harder to tell in the darkness, but whatever it was, it would still provide some cover, some protection from the elements of the Cylus cold. So, with his scarf pulled up over his pink-tipped nose, Laures pulled his lover towards the strange establishment, his arm linked with the other’s to keep him close. The closer they got, the more his fingers itched to move, to tap against his coat and his perfect husband’s arm, but he forced them to remain still. This would be fine. As with the others… if he was not welcome here, then he would leave, and they could just give up this painful search.
But, by some good fortune (or perhaps because of the scarf concealing half of his face), they were not approached and told to leave once they’d stepped over the threshold. Under cover of the patched-up hull, the various lights provided more than enough illumination for Laures to get his bearings in the… tavern? Mess hall? What even was this place, exactly? A few heads turned as they stepped through, out of mere curiosity, but to his delight, there were no glares. No stern frowns, no rolled eyes, no hushed whispers that he could see. Laures sniffed, leaning slightly closer to his husband as he reached up to lower his scarf.
“Seems promising,” he mentioned lightly, if only to let Carver know that he had not completely given up just yet. “Maybe someone here could at least give us something more to go off of. Or at least let us know if we’re looking in the right place. I - oh, shit.”
It was the scarf, wasn’t it. He had only just lowered it moments ago, and already someone was striding over, likely on his way to kick him out. Laures straightened up, though he did not release Carver’s arm, and he watched in silence as a (much smaller) man approached. With his dark hair pulled back into a bun, his bright green eyes were revealed; his features were soft and rounded, though his body was small, short in stature and surely as skinny as Laures’ old body had been. Human, Laures thought, or at least close enough. He was not focused on much more than his face, too busy working out the emotion behind his expression. Was he upset? Pleased? Worried? Not quite, but something like that.
“What are you two doing here?”
Concerned. His tone gave it away, his voice high in pitch but low in volume. He approached them with his hands on his (lack of) hips, and looked from Carver to Laures with a strange look, almost like a mother might look at her worrisome child.
“Uh… what do you mean?”
The man (he must have been a few arcs younger than himself, closer to Carver’s age) raised his eyebrows, and Laures heard a quiet exhale from his nose, as if he had somehow amused him.
“I thought you were, uh - that you two had…” and again, he looked at Carver, and for once, someone seemed more wary of his husband than of him.
Laures held Carver’s arm a little tighter, and said, “change of plans. Is there a problem?”
Another little amused huff, before a small smile appeared on the young man’s face. Shaking his head, he began to turn, and motioned for them to follow. “No problem. Come on, Rausi’s here too. Where’s Avery? She coming by later?”
He had already started walking. Laures glanced at his husband, flooded for a trill with that same familiar nervousness, before he looked forward and moved to follow along.
“Yes - maybe. I haven’t talked to her.”
Didn’t know who the fuck she was, either. Laures loosened his hold on Carver’s arm (but did not let go) as the little man walked them through the tavern-mess hall-hull-establishment and down to the other end of it, where the tables were a bit less crowded. What would these people do, if they discovered him? Would it ever even occur to them, that he might not be Iver? That he might not be their… whatever Iver was to them? Or might they just think that he had changed, that he had suddenly adopted new mannerisms and all? What could they really do to him either way? Something about that question brought him comfort, and as they approached the table, Laures again looked towards his lover, to offer a small smile of reassurance. Whether it was for himself or for Carver, he did not know.
The little man sat down. There was a woman already seated - Rausi, he supposed - and she glanced up at them as they neared the table, but her expression did not change. Stern, or perhaps just unemotional - something about her seemed sharp. Her hair was short, slicked back, dyed blue; her dark eyes settled over them and Laures could not quite tell, in their depths, if she was pleased. When she spoke, her words were harsh not in nature, but in sound, as they ripped through the air like some shrill squawk.
“You,” and she smiled, somehow, as she looked at Iver. “I did not think I would see you again. Sit.”
Laures was grateful for the layers covering his chest, for he was certain that his heart would have been seen, beating as hard as it was against it. He released Carver’s arm with no small amount of reluctance, and moved to sit, glancing up at his husband in want for him to do the same.
“So, what’s up with all this, then?” the little man asked, and Laures’ lips parted, though he did not speak. It seemed the man was directing his questions at Carver, anyhow. “Finally come to your senses and drop that girl of yours? Or… Ivy, you didn’t get him kicked out too, did you?”
After the first place proved useless (he was told to leave before he even got his foot in the door) and the second followed suit, Laures had become largely unmotivated in their search. While he did his best not to show it too clearly, it was wearing him thin, being so… unwanted. He was no stranger to the feeling, as he had not exactly been wanted in his previous life either - but it was different. He had been wanted in other ways, even if not the ones he would have preferred, and it had still felt better than this. Better than being glared at and told to leave, better than almost getting thrown out of the only place they’d found true shelter in thus far. He might have been little more than an object in his previous life, something to use and discard, but now, he felt like even less. He felt like nothing. He wasn’t even good enough to be used.
He tried to remind himself, as one break stretched into two and they continued on their cold search, that it was not him that these people so disliked. He did not even know any of them, and they certainly didn’t know him. All of their opinions, their judgements, their perceptions - all of them were based entirely on a man he had replaced, and did not reflect what they might think of him should they give him the chance to show himself. But it still did not feel good, when his lover was greeted with such respectful, friendly delight, and he was met with a glare and a grunt. But it didn’t matter, or it wouldn’t, soon enough. The people here might not have cared for him, or for Iver, but he did not care for them either, and did not plan on sticking around regardless.
So it was a turbulent blend of relief and reluctance when they came upon the Lemon Messy. Odd though it was, Laures found some comfort in the fact that he could not be shoved out through a door, should this place turn out to be like the others. Besides, the walls - or, the… ship? Was it an upturned ship? It was harder to tell in the darkness, but whatever it was, it would still provide some cover, some protection from the elements of the Cylus cold. So, with his scarf pulled up over his pink-tipped nose, Laures pulled his lover towards the strange establishment, his arm linked with the other’s to keep him close. The closer they got, the more his fingers itched to move, to tap against his coat and his perfect husband’s arm, but he forced them to remain still. This would be fine. As with the others… if he was not welcome here, then he would leave, and they could just give up this painful search.
But, by some good fortune (or perhaps because of the scarf concealing half of his face), they were not approached and told to leave once they’d stepped over the threshold. Under cover of the patched-up hull, the various lights provided more than enough illumination for Laures to get his bearings in the… tavern? Mess hall? What even was this place, exactly? A few heads turned as they stepped through, out of mere curiosity, but to his delight, there were no glares. No stern frowns, no rolled eyes, no hushed whispers that he could see. Laures sniffed, leaning slightly closer to his husband as he reached up to lower his scarf.
“Seems promising,” he mentioned lightly, if only to let Carver know that he had not completely given up just yet. “Maybe someone here could at least give us something more to go off of. Or at least let us know if we’re looking in the right place. I - oh, shit.”
It was the scarf, wasn’t it. He had only just lowered it moments ago, and already someone was striding over, likely on his way to kick him out. Laures straightened up, though he did not release Carver’s arm, and he watched in silence as a (much smaller) man approached. With his dark hair pulled back into a bun, his bright green eyes were revealed; his features were soft and rounded, though his body was small, short in stature and surely as skinny as Laures’ old body had been. Human, Laures thought, or at least close enough. He was not focused on much more than his face, too busy working out the emotion behind his expression. Was he upset? Pleased? Worried? Not quite, but something like that.
“What are you two doing here?”
Concerned. His tone gave it away, his voice high in pitch but low in volume. He approached them with his hands on his (lack of) hips, and looked from Carver to Laures with a strange look, almost like a mother might look at her worrisome child.
“Uh… what do you mean?”
The man (he must have been a few arcs younger than himself, closer to Carver’s age) raised his eyebrows, and Laures heard a quiet exhale from his nose, as if he had somehow amused him.
“I thought you were, uh - that you two had…” and again, he looked at Carver, and for once, someone seemed more wary of his husband than of him.
Laures held Carver’s arm a little tighter, and said, “change of plans. Is there a problem?”
Another little amused huff, before a small smile appeared on the young man’s face. Shaking his head, he began to turn, and motioned for them to follow. “No problem. Come on, Rausi’s here too. Where’s Avery? She coming by later?”
He had already started walking. Laures glanced at his husband, flooded for a trill with that same familiar nervousness, before he looked forward and moved to follow along.
“Yes - maybe. I haven’t talked to her.”
Didn’t know who the fuck she was, either. Laures loosened his hold on Carver’s arm (but did not let go) as the little man walked them through the tavern-mess hall-hull-establishment and down to the other end of it, where the tables were a bit less crowded. What would these people do, if they discovered him? Would it ever even occur to them, that he might not be Iver? That he might not be their… whatever Iver was to them? Or might they just think that he had changed, that he had suddenly adopted new mannerisms and all? What could they really do to him either way? Something about that question brought him comfort, and as they approached the table, Laures again looked towards his lover, to offer a small smile of reassurance. Whether it was for himself or for Carver, he did not know.
The little man sat down. There was a woman already seated - Rausi, he supposed - and she glanced up at them as they neared the table, but her expression did not change. Stern, or perhaps just unemotional - something about her seemed sharp. Her hair was short, slicked back, dyed blue; her dark eyes settled over them and Laures could not quite tell, in their depths, if she was pleased. When she spoke, her words were harsh not in nature, but in sound, as they ripped through the air like some shrill squawk.
“You,” and she smiled, somehow, as she looked at Iver. “I did not think I would see you again. Sit.”
Laures was grateful for the layers covering his chest, for he was certain that his heart would have been seen, beating as hard as it was against it. He released Carver’s arm with no small amount of reluctance, and moved to sit, glancing up at his husband in want for him to do the same.
“So, what’s up with all this, then?” the little man asked, and Laures’ lips parted, though he did not speak. It seemed the man was directing his questions at Carver, anyhow. “Finally come to your senses and drop that girl of yours? Or… Ivy, you didn’t get him kicked out too, did you?”