• Mature • And Sheer Frakking Will (Graded)

Etzos, ‘The City of Stones’ is a fortress against the encroachment of Immortal domination of Idalos. Founded on the backs of mortals driven to seek their own destiny independent of the Immortals, the city has carved itself out of the very rock of the land. Scourged by terrible wars of extermination, they've begun to grow again, and with an eye toward expansion, optimism is on the rise.

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Kasoria
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And Sheer Frakking Will (Graded)

14th Zi'da, 716
South Side
3rd break


Continued from here

She cursed Finn. She cursed ever knowing him. She cursed the first time she'd met him, the first time he'd ever made her smile, the first good word she'd put in for him and, most of all, that she'd ever breathed aloud to the world the truth that she cared for him. Loved him, in that pure and impractical way that only the the young can love. Oh, and she meant it, too. For trials she'd been bound and gagged and blindfolded. Sightless, soundless, powerless. Beyond her bindings, she knew she was a prisoner. Locked in a fetid little room that stank of piss and mold. Clawed feet scampered around under her mattress. A few times, they weren't under it, and only her mad thrashing had frightened them off.

Betty had cried and begged until her throat was raw and her eyes dry. She cursed Finn every time she did. And every time - without fail - she took it all back.

"I want to see you... one more time," she'd whispered to the darkness, as she smelled the smoke and heard the madness unfolding outside. "But since I won't, I... I hope you-"

The door was kicked nearly off its hinges and the monster of a man that watched over her stomped in to claim her. She gaze a squeak as she was carried out through a smoky, flaming hallway. Then she screamed so loud when they jumped out the window that her gag slipped off. She breathed in the freezing air that sizzled on her skin black with soot and smoke. She was alive. There was no surer way to know than this prickling of her skin... and then she saw Death. They all did.

One by one, Silvester's men died in front of her. Until only the man himself was left, a dagger to her throat, using her as a hostage, as a shield, as just one more thing. Just like he used everyone else around him, once he'd finished pouring shit into their ears. Finn included.

Finn.

Betty closed her eyes, and heard boots crunch slowly over the ground. Getting closer. Inescapable. Implacable. She'd never seen anyone kill so coldly. It was almost like artistry, the marrying of lethal skill to smooth, practiced movements. He didn't waste an ounce of muscle or energy. His blows were precise, almost like he was a healer turned away from mending bodies and gone far, far the other direction. But Betty knew what he was. He was a scratcher, a gutter mercenary, and she'd known plenty. But as she watched him, as he killed, and she took in the ragged cloak and the masses of hair... and then saw those black, bottomless eyes... she breathed three words.

"The Raggedy Man..."

"Shut up you fuckin' slut."

Not so fancy in his words when he panicked, was Silvester. He snarled them in her ear as the assassin put the last touches to Haev. Then he was walking towards them and Betty closed her eyes. Silvester was making his speech, giving his terms, with that sneer of cold command he was so used to. Betty whined as she felt the fine, sharp, sickening pain of her flesh being parted, just under her chin. The Raggedy Man did not say anything back. He was just watching them. In that same, intense way she'd seen Finn do. When he had much to decide and ponder, his body seemed to still itself in every way. Until all that potential, all that life, was just in his head... until he decided to let it out.

He looked her in the eyes, and told her she wouldn't die. Betty's own widened, and her mouth opened to beg just as Silvester's opened to bark and-

SHUUUUK

There was just enough time for her to blink, but no longer. In that time, the gladius at the man's side went from pointing to the floor and vertical, to horizontal and thrust out across the frozen air and-

-she could see her face in the bloody steel, mere inches from her face. The gladius had shot past her face, through one of her ears and-

Wet. Ugly. Retching. Words bubbling and not coming out. A mind that wasn't working properly, or lacked the machinery to work any longer. The dagger to her throat started to dance and jerk. She stiffened yet again as another line was carved in her. This was it. This was-

No. Not that night.

The dagger started to lower. The arm around her loosened. Betty opened her eyes. The pains and cramps of days in bondage... the pulsing, needling, dribbling cuts on her neck... the rushing, roaring agony in her ear... all of this was forgotten for a moment. She was suddenly free, and she looked around as the sweaty bulk behind her sighed with bile slick on its tongue-

-and she turned, to see the gladius punched through his eye socket.

Betty tried to scream but she was too exhausted, too frightened. Instead she staggered away and her bonds brought her down. She couldn't look away, scrambling on her backside as best she could but unable to tear her gaze from this horror. The sight of the Raggedy Man, still again, holding the gladius that skewered Silvester through the eye. The Professor, the master of The Rues, now just a twitching statue of meat that didn't understand it was dead. Spasming like a cat struck by lightning, dagger still gripped tight and yet useless. Behind them both, the watermill burned and burned and the bodies within were cremated all together.

Kasoria ripped the blade out with a wet, sucking sound. Silvester coughed, and Betty wondered if it was a conscious act or just his lungs trying to purge themselves-

-then silver and scarlet arced through the air. Kasoria swung the blade in a flat, easy motion, with both hands-

Silvester's body sank to his knees. Then slumped forward. His head went somewhere else.

"Right," the Raggedy Man said to her, his face a mass of shadows thanks to the inferno behind him. Save for his eyes. Two pinpricks, like twin stars in a sky where all others had died out. "Let's finish this..."
word count: 1068
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Kasoria
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Re: And Sheer Frakking Will

"nonopleasenodontIlldoanythingpleasedontpleaseplease-"

"Oh, shut up girl, an' lemme see yer fuckin' ear, will ya?"

The tone alone was enough to have Betty do just that. Probably not expecting the bogeyman of South Etzos to sound more like a grouchy grandpa than an invincible assassin. Truth was, Kasoria didn't care much how she regarded him. His wounds were starting to ache, and not just from the exertion. The cold of night and early morning was weighing on him, more and more. All this movement and activity, it wasn't good for his healing. Caspar would grouse about how his stitches were coming loose, he was sure of it.

The girl did nothing as he grabbed her by the chin and jerked her head to one side. The smelly little man grunted as he examined the hole where a shapely eat used to be. The gladius had demolished it, ripping apart what it hadn't simply cleaved off like fat off a shank. Kasoria grunted again, only with the ghost of a smile buried under his beard. He had a two inch opening and maybe two trills to work with. More likely one. And in that time, in that space?

The Raggedy Man looked over his shoulder and the two, very separated parts of "Professor Silvester".

Not bad, old man.

"You... You almost killed-"

"Risk I had t'take," Kasoria said without any hint of regret. He reached over to Haev's corpse and used his gladius to rip the back of his shirt clean off the dead man's back. With a towel-sized expanse in his hands to work with now, he stuck the short sword in the ground, started to fold it. "Either that, or put it through yer throat, an' his behind yeh."

"Why didn't you?"

"He wasn't wrong," Kasoria admitted, pressing the cloth to her bleeding head and grabbing her other hand, slapping it against the makeshift bandage. "I made that deal he was talkin' about. Here, press on this. Oh, don't fuckin' squirm-"

"It hurts, okay?!"

She snapped and a fair bit of fire was left in those words. Kasoria was almost impressed. A trial or two as nothing but meat in that house, at the mercy of men keeping her alive solely to be used for bargaining, or as bait, and she was already adjusting. Cursing like a lifelong sellsword as she pressed the shirt to her head... and then made it even better by ripping a longer piece off, and typing the bandage straight to her head.

"It'll bleed, but that should staunch the worse of it," he said as he got to his feet, not even trying to hide his groan as his left leg screamed in protest. "S'cold, too, so that'll slow the bleedin'." The Raggedy Man looked her up and down, and nodded to himself. "You'll make the walk back. Then Caspar'll-"

"The walk back to where?"

"Yer boy. Finn. He's with Mister Vorund."

She didn't trust him, but she couldn't hide the sunrise in her eyes at the sound of the little cunt's name. Kasoria blinked at the sight of it. Had he felt that way before? Had he looked like that, when someone's name was spoken? He couldn't imagine it, or remember. His son, his sister, his mother, well... that was family. But this, what bloomed in Betty's eyes and overflowed onto her smiling lips? That was love. Sickly sweet and so tragically, wonderfully pliable.

"Finn? He-He's okay?"

"Well... he's banged up a bit, but he ain't dead." Her face fell and Kasoria shrugged. "Nothin' lastin'. Wee cunt jus' got mouthy. C'mon. Gotta get movin', 'fore they come for the fire."

"Who comes?"

Kasoria plucked up his sword, and sheathed it. Then he yanked her upright with about as much tact and grace as Haev had treated her with. Finally, he picked up Silvester's head by the hair, and stowed it in the sack that had carried the fire bottles a few bits before.

"Dun' matter. I jus' don't wanna be around when they geddere. C'mon."

He started walking and she was at his heels a few moments later. They were halfway back to Etzos when they heard the sound of rushing feet ahead of them. From out the darkness between the blazing city and the burning watermill, came spilling a crowd of men. Carrying buckets and blankets and flagons, all sloshing with water. Any other place, one might think they were brave volunteers, seeking to save lives and preserve property. From under his hood, Kasoria smiled, and knew differently.

Save lives if it ain't too much trouble, and filch as much property as ain't burned up, more like.

"You were so fast."

"Huh?"

"I said, you were so fast," Betty said from his side, keeping up with the limping man easily enough despite her exhaustion. She was so addled with nervous disbelief right now, she probably couldn't have been slow if she'd tried. "I mean, I just blinked and... and he was dead."

Kasoria snorted softly. It was nice to be appreciated, he supposed. He remembered the stillness of that golden, glorious moment before he struck. The way he'd seemed to order his whole body into atrophy. Quieting every muscle, every limb, every stretch of flesh. Keeping all of it contained and coiled within his muscles. Letting his mind thus wander from the burden of monitoring them, and focus instead on Silvester. Watching his lips move as he spoke, but not really following his words. Just waiting for him to pause. Then speaking his own words... and waiting again.

For his lips to part. For him to start talking again. Because in that moment, when his mind had something to say, his body would drop it's guard just enough to give Kasoria his opening.

Once that trill came, it was simply a matter of strength, form, and will. Kasoria had all three, and he'd proved it that night.

"Let's get you to yer man," Kasoria said, unwilling to mar his reputation by divulging such details. He'd worked hard at cultivating a Scary Little Fucker image, and fucked if he was going to let it come to naught by chatting with some girl. "Fix yer ear as best we can."

They walked on in the darkness, as the looting, rescuing crew rushed past them and towards the inferno. By the time they reached the gates, there were cries of murder and massacre from the burning ruins. But by then, man and girl were gone. Swallowed by the alleys and the gutters, the Underground and the cobble streets. Taking nothing from the destruction, save a head, and a story that would be told and told a hundred times before dawn.

Aye. Don't fuck with Old Man Vorund.
word count: 1160
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Re: And Sheer Frakking Will


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Kasoria

Kasoria
Skill Points: +10 (cannot be used for magic)
Magic XP: None.

Renown: +20 (singlehandedly wiping out The Rues and bringing their leader's head to Vorund)

Injuries/Overstepping: None.
Wealth Points: None.
Loot: +1 Silvester Head.

Skill Knowledge:
  • Blades (Gladius): Killing Thrust Through the Eye
  • Medicine: Examining a Wound
  • Meditation: Willing Your Muscles to Stillness
  • Philosophy: Kill Who You have To
  • Strength: Striking in the Space of a Trill
  • Tactics: Striking the Instant an Enemy is About to Speak
Non-Skill Knowledge:
  • Etzos Culture: Property Fires are Always Good Opportunities for Looting!
  • NPC Betty: Finn O'Connor's Sweetheart
  • NPC Betty: Tougher Than She Looks
Notes: n/a.

I first read this without the music, then read it again with the music. I've heard the track before, but it suits the perspective of Betty in a way that adds to the narrative. Piano instrumentals have a way of adding emotional depth to narrative that might get glossed over or lost in the read. Sometimes, piano tracks can be cloying and not add any depth to the prose - that wasn't the case here. I'll say reading it with the music gave Betty a much softer feel than I got from her when I read the prose silently. You have a knack for picking the right sort of songs to go along with the scenes.

Silvester's death was inevitable and I appreciate that with all this lead up, it got done in perfect Kasoria style: quick, brutal, effective, and just a lil dirty. It was exactly the sort of execution a villain like Silvester deserved with a twist thrown in with how it was accomplished.

And after all that, he saved the girl. even if he took her ear off.

Maybe Kasoria is a hero-akfjekaljfe aah ok.... antihero. Maybe.

This thread series from According to Plan to this, was incredibly enjoyable to read through. A lot of different techniques were employed through each thread, NPCs were utilized wonderfully. Different pacing and rhythm were given based on the threads, but each thread had a sense of containment rather than varying techniques/frames too wildly, too rapidly in a way that might've given reader-whiplash.

Beyond the technical side of things, the story itself was compelling, immersive, and dynamic. Every scene built onto the next, added context, gave meaning to what was happening next. It offered greater insight in Kasoria as a character, as well as the world around him, and I have to commend your ability to stay so consistent to his character while also finding ways to develop him. Thank you for writing this series and enjoy your rewards!

PM me if you have any questions, issues or concerns.

Total Word Count: 2242 words.
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