30th of Cylus, 718
“Hold them.”
“I am.” Cirrina retorted as curtly as ever though she was fairly distracted, with each of her tentacles dabbling in other frequencies.
“Find me.”
“I keep finding fish.”
“Then use your head and not your stomach.”
The mer bared her teeth in a quiet snarl but did as he asked, releasing two of frequencies to search. She wasn’t tuned in to everything around her but it was is there was always faint music, now she just had to find a familiar chord but it was gone, hidden from her, it was—
“You’ve hidden yourself.” She snapped flatly, opening her eyes to glare at her mentor who smiled.
“I have.”
“Then what was the point!”
“For you to see how many frequencies you can hold, to see for yourself if you can find the note of magic.” He held up a hand to forestall any arguments, “Attunement is not a dangerous domain but any magic has consequence. Had you reached for more frequencies rather than release the ones you held, well, you would have overstepped. Had you forced yourself into my frequency you may have found yourself stuck.”
Knowing what he wanted from her wasn’t snark the mer bit back her tart response, one day she was going to rip this humans tongue out and feast on it but that was not today. “And why would you not just tell me.”
“I need you to understand the limits of your magic, not mine. When you have more magic in you, you will understand why this is an important lesson.”
That genuinely perked the mer up, eagerly leaning toward her teacher who leaned forward as well. For what seemed like hours he assessed her without a word then leaned back, “I believe you are ready.”
“Thats why we’re here?”
“Is there any other reason I’d bring you to my room?”
She made a face, “I would hope not though,” her eyes traveled his form, “I’m never entirely against it.”
He raised an eyebrow then smiled, that annoying smile that said she would feel a fool for whatever happened next. That smile made her want to slice his lips open from ear to ear. More so when that smile came closer and closer to her face, until she could feel his breath on her lips. But she she refused to avert her gaze to which his smile only become smug. Oh yes, one day she would wipe that insipid smile from his face.
“Thats a good girl,” she had hands in her human form, they itched to strike his cheek, “stay looking into my eyes, and do not look away no matter what you feel. Do you understand?”
“I do.”
“You won’t be happy with the results if you don’t keep still.”
“I get it.”
“Actually, you don’t but I think you wouldn’t care either way in the end.”
“…what does that mean?” Cirrina finally caved to the cryptic speech, smart enough to pull back slowly.
“It means, should I fail then you will feel nothing at all.”
If that was meant to frighten her it didn’t work, after all, what would she care if she couldn’t feel? It was probably kinder than some of what she felt more often than not.
“Then don’t fail.” She finally replied and leaned forward once more to look into his strange multifaceted eyes that her own would soon mirror.
It was a strange sensation to feel nothing but know you should feel something. Logically he had warned her, told her what to look out for but there was nothing to look out for. She felt calm, relaxed more than she ever had before. The core part of her protested this violently, warnings of previous teachings gone bad, how far she’d fallen with Calilious, how she could not do so again. Yet, none of those bothered her. Nothing did.
Her hair slipped over her shoulders, a distraction but a firm hand on her jaw kept her head from moving. Now she felt as if she could not look away, there was nothing uncomfortable about it. The mer would just have to occupy her time cataloging the various hues in her teachers eyes.
As she did, she could feel a faint sensation, behind her eyes, plucking at each piece of her but it wasn’t her concern. Her concern was to look into Marins eyes. Eyes that looked so distant, as if they were focused on other things too, internal or maybe things she didn’t, couldn’t care about. But even as she thought all this it continued until the pressure felt as if it was pulling, picking, plucking, pushing, parading into her being. Something was making a home for itself, something she could control as she as wanted.
And on it went.
It felt as though Cirrina had fallen into a void of eye colors, a void of feelings that was everything and nothing and if she stared just a little farther she’d find some key. What the key did she wasn’t sure but she knew she wanted it. Even as it seemed to force apart the calm parts of her, leaving hidden linger feelings.
Greed. Lust. Curiosity. Guilt.
So many tangled emotions that felt so like her own but so startling different for if the mer was honest she couldn’t even say what guilt looked like, let alone what it felt like. Curiosity that perked up her other Spark deep within her, welcoming, urging.
Worry. Amazement. Disbelief.
Were those hers or his? How long had she really been looking into these eyes that broadcasted emotions like colors, colors that made more sense to her now than they ever did before. Could they even hide anything from one another anymore? Was that not the point? Or was it the control she felt always sliding from her grasp in the turbulent storms of her own emotions. But these ones were softer. Muted. Settling into her but her.
But she could make them her.
She could control them.
Twist them.
If only it would settle, connect to the threads already there much like her attunement heard the notes, this new sensation could feel them. Perhaps distantly but there all the same.
Like tangle of seaweed or currents that met at each ocean and sea until they were all one huge puddle. Even the rivers could bleed into them until they were all one, there was no end or beginning to it at all. But the waters were not merged just yet, if she could feel them it needed to be farther, had push it, pull it deeper. Whose thoughts those were was hard to say but she knew it to be true all the same.
This was crucial.
Important.
Give in.
Frustration.
Her or him?
Was there even two separate people, a part of her wished to reach for the notes, to see, to know but she could not. Would not. It had to wait, patience was key here. Focus on his eyes, she thought to herself so deeply it was not a thought at all but an integral feeling, a part of her very soul.
Such a pitiful thought she would chide herself for later but for now she only stared. Each color was the range of his feeling, his feelings that seemed so masked now open, welcoming her. They were no longer eyes but color pools, pools she wanted to dive into until she split apart in them nothing but color herself.
A chaotic out of control thought but no less true. Soon she could control it. She felt it. Knew it in her bones. When he was done Cirrina could both allow herself to fall into any pool of colors because she owned those pool of colors, both his and hers.
And distantly around them Idalos went on, footsteps outside the door heeding the ‘Do Not Disturb’ warning posted but curious. Sleep at this hour? The vocal duo inside so silent the owners thought maybe a happy couple, napping as they tip toed away.
Inside it was so close.
So close they could almost pull their gazes away and still the feelings would be there. They had taken root, overpowered, consumed, joined until it was all one. The mer knew this, felt the bundle so new, so much stronger than her other, settling in a place above it without a fuss for even the other new this new Spark was in charge. Seniority would play no part here as it made its new home, both student and teacher falling back, eyes slipping shut in exhaustion as the stiffness of sitting for so long finally hit them.
“I am.” Cirrina retorted as curtly as ever though she was fairly distracted, with each of her tentacles dabbling in other frequencies.
“Find me.”
“I keep finding fish.”
“Then use your head and not your stomach.”
The mer bared her teeth in a quiet snarl but did as he asked, releasing two of frequencies to search. She wasn’t tuned in to everything around her but it was is there was always faint music, now she just had to find a familiar chord but it was gone, hidden from her, it was—
“You’ve hidden yourself.” She snapped flatly, opening her eyes to glare at her mentor who smiled.
“I have.”
“Then what was the point!”
“For you to see how many frequencies you can hold, to see for yourself if you can find the note of magic.” He held up a hand to forestall any arguments, “Attunement is not a dangerous domain but any magic has consequence. Had you reached for more frequencies rather than release the ones you held, well, you would have overstepped. Had you forced yourself into my frequency you may have found yourself stuck.”
Knowing what he wanted from her wasn’t snark the mer bit back her tart response, one day she was going to rip this humans tongue out and feast on it but that was not today. “And why would you not just tell me.”
“I need you to understand the limits of your magic, not mine. When you have more magic in you, you will understand why this is an important lesson.”
That genuinely perked the mer up, eagerly leaning toward her teacher who leaned forward as well. For what seemed like hours he assessed her without a word then leaned back, “I believe you are ready.”
“Thats why we’re here?”
“Is there any other reason I’d bring you to my room?”
She made a face, “I would hope not though,” her eyes traveled his form, “I’m never entirely against it.”
He raised an eyebrow then smiled, that annoying smile that said she would feel a fool for whatever happened next. That smile made her want to slice his lips open from ear to ear. More so when that smile came closer and closer to her face, until she could feel his breath on her lips. But she she refused to avert her gaze to which his smile only become smug. Oh yes, one day she would wipe that insipid smile from his face.
“Thats a good girl,” she had hands in her human form, they itched to strike his cheek, “stay looking into my eyes, and do not look away no matter what you feel. Do you understand?”
“I do.”
“You won’t be happy with the results if you don’t keep still.”
“I get it.”
“Actually, you don’t but I think you wouldn’t care either way in the end.”
“…what does that mean?” Cirrina finally caved to the cryptic speech, smart enough to pull back slowly.
“It means, should I fail then you will feel nothing at all.”
If that was meant to frighten her it didn’t work, after all, what would she care if she couldn’t feel? It was probably kinder than some of what she felt more often than not.
“Then don’t fail.” She finally replied and leaned forward once more to look into his strange multifaceted eyes that her own would soon mirror.
It was a strange sensation to feel nothing but know you should feel something. Logically he had warned her, told her what to look out for but there was nothing to look out for. She felt calm, relaxed more than she ever had before. The core part of her protested this violently, warnings of previous teachings gone bad, how far she’d fallen with Calilious, how she could not do so again. Yet, none of those bothered her. Nothing did.
Her hair slipped over her shoulders, a distraction but a firm hand on her jaw kept her head from moving. Now she felt as if she could not look away, there was nothing uncomfortable about it. The mer would just have to occupy her time cataloging the various hues in her teachers eyes.
As she did, she could feel a faint sensation, behind her eyes, plucking at each piece of her but it wasn’t her concern. Her concern was to look into Marins eyes. Eyes that looked so distant, as if they were focused on other things too, internal or maybe things she didn’t, couldn’t care about. But even as she thought all this it continued until the pressure felt as if it was pulling, picking, plucking, pushing, parading into her being. Something was making a home for itself, something she could control as she as wanted.
And on it went.
It felt as though Cirrina had fallen into a void of eye colors, a void of feelings that was everything and nothing and if she stared just a little farther she’d find some key. What the key did she wasn’t sure but she knew she wanted it. Even as it seemed to force apart the calm parts of her, leaving hidden linger feelings.
Greed. Lust. Curiosity. Guilt.
So many tangled emotions that felt so like her own but so startling different for if the mer was honest she couldn’t even say what guilt looked like, let alone what it felt like. Curiosity that perked up her other Spark deep within her, welcoming, urging.
Worry. Amazement. Disbelief.
Were those hers or his? How long had she really been looking into these eyes that broadcasted emotions like colors, colors that made more sense to her now than they ever did before. Could they even hide anything from one another anymore? Was that not the point? Or was it the control she felt always sliding from her grasp in the turbulent storms of her own emotions. But these ones were softer. Muted. Settling into her but her.
But she could make them her.
She could control them.
Twist them.
If only it would settle, connect to the threads already there much like her attunement heard the notes, this new sensation could feel them. Perhaps distantly but there all the same.
Like tangle of seaweed or currents that met at each ocean and sea until they were all one huge puddle. Even the rivers could bleed into them until they were all one, there was no end or beginning to it at all. But the waters were not merged just yet, if she could feel them it needed to be farther, had push it, pull it deeper. Whose thoughts those were was hard to say but she knew it to be true all the same.
This was crucial.
Important.
Give in.
Frustration.
Her or him?
Was there even two separate people, a part of her wished to reach for the notes, to see, to know but she could not. Would not. It had to wait, patience was key here. Focus on his eyes, she thought to herself so deeply it was not a thought at all but an integral feeling, a part of her very soul.
Such a pitiful thought she would chide herself for later but for now she only stared. Each color was the range of his feeling, his feelings that seemed so masked now open, welcoming her. They were no longer eyes but color pools, pools she wanted to dive into until she split apart in them nothing but color herself.
A chaotic out of control thought but no less true. Soon she could control it. She felt it. Knew it in her bones. When he was done Cirrina could both allow herself to fall into any pool of colors because she owned those pool of colors, both his and hers.
And distantly around them Idalos went on, footsteps outside the door heeding the ‘Do Not Disturb’ warning posted but curious. Sleep at this hour? The vocal duo inside so silent the owners thought maybe a happy couple, napping as they tip toed away.
Inside it was so close.
So close they could almost pull their gazes away and still the feelings would be there. They had taken root, overpowered, consumed, joined until it was all one. The mer knew this, felt the bundle so new, so much stronger than her other, settling in a place above it without a fuss for even the other new this new Spark was in charge. Seniority would play no part here as it made its new home, both student and teacher falling back, eyes slipping shut in exhaustion as the stiffness of sitting for so long finally hit them.
