Breathing Space
"That's real good, Ipi," Vega said, looking down at the piece of writing Joy had done. "Let me have a look, properly, alright?"
Vega slowly, carefully read the words that
Joy
had written, a story about a child who went on an adventure with her father. It was always a slow and difficult process, for Vega, reading anything. She had not been able to read, after all, until she was an adult - Arlo had taught her - and the letters just refused to stay still. "Mama?" Joy said and Vega lifted her gaze.
They were sitting together, inside their family tent in the living area. Joy had one of those looks on her face which told Vega that she was very serious. "What is it, Ipi?" Vega asked. Joy frowned and thought about her words. There was something on her mind, Vega knew. She also knew that Joy would say it when she was ready. Vega didn't push, didn't ask; it wouldn't do any good and Vega had learned, somewhere along the line, that the best way to be a mother was to be what her daughter needed her to be. Even when that meant being entirely unlike herself.
What always amazed Vega was just how easy it was. Not because it was easy but because the children needed it. She didn't have to think about being patient, waiting to see what the questions were; she instinctively knew what it was they needed from her - but it was more than that, knowing what it was that they needed meant that Vega simply slipped into the role. Being a mother was all-encompassing and she loved every minute. Even the hard ones.
"I'm sorry, Mama," Joy said, and Vega's eyebrow shot up. "Schnizzle my snoot, Ipi, I didn't expect that. What are you sorry for?"
Joy thought about it for a moment and then spoke in a rush. "I asked you to read the story an' I know that you don't like reading, and I'm sorry."
Vega knew that fundamentally that wasn't what Joy was speaking about - that it was a mechanism. Yet it was a vehicle for Joy to speak and so Vega was happy to allow it to continue. "Well, that's not right, Ipi. I love readin' things what you've written." Vega's eyes were entirely on her daughter. "I find it frustratin' that I'm slow, but I love readin' your words."
Joy frowned. "It's Conlan's birth-trial tomorrow, Mama. What are we doing for it?" It seemed to be a bit of a segue, but Vega was seeing a pattern.
"Well, Papa has some ideas, I think. Is there somethin' that you want to do?"
"The story's for him," Joy said and Vega smiled. "Mama, I don't want you to leave," she suddenly blurted out and Vega breathed in. There it was. "Do you promise you'll never leave me?"
Vega shook her head. "I can't promise that, Ipi. But I can promise you what Papa can promise you," Joy looked at her and frowned, but she didn't ask. "I can promise you that I will never want to be apart from you, an' if it's in my power to be, then I'll be here with you."