• Closed • [Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

Some idle fashion perusing leads to two old friends being reunited

The capital city of the of Rynmere, here is seated the only King in Idalos.
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Valeria Burhan
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[Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

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31 Zi'da 717
One thing that Valeria could never deny was her love of luxury and even though it could be highly injurious to her purse, she couldn't resist being surrounded by pretty things. When she'd first come to Andaris, she'd been inclined to explore, especially in the Mid-Town area around her new home. It was during one such excursion that she'd stumbled upon a little gem nestled off the main thoroughfare, a place of such luxury that it had stunned her to find it in what was a rather poor location for such a place. If it had been in The Crown, it would have been overrun with nobility but instead, it had always been underappreciated and gone almost unnoticed in the first arc or so of its establishment. Word of mouth had made it a little busier over the arcs but the blonde had found that it was always on the quieter side all the same; rarely had she entered it to find another customer. Still, the small clientele made it feel far more exclusive and despite being someone who liked to draw the attention of others, the noblewoman found that it was appealed to her to have an audience of one, namely the shop's owner, Ericor Eddrick.

When she entered, she was greeted with the sight of mannequins, fine materials and some comfortable chairs. There was a subtle tinkle of a bell, not too intrusive but sufficient to allow the owner to know that he had a visitor who required his attention.

"Lady Burhan! A pleasure as always," Ericor purred, appearing before her to bow low and take her hand to kiss.

"Now, Ericor, the pleasure is all mine. You know that," she commented with a laugh, raising her fingers to stroke the short growth of hair at the side of his cheek before he could withdraw. They shared a smile before he ushered her into one of the waiting seats, offering her wine and other luxuries for her to enjoy. She daren't accept the offerings, all too aware that she wasn't going to spend nearly enough nel to warrant such fare. In fact, she was considering spending so little that the man would likely be horrified. She could only hope that he wouldn't take it as an affront.

"You'll have wine, my dear. Just one little glass surely. Come, V, you enjoy life's fine things. You might as well sit and relax while I show you some of my new, beautiful creations," the owner urged, while the blonde tried to figure out how to broach the subject delicately. After all, she'd been here only the previous season and she'd been willing to part with 40 gold nel then so how was she supposed to explain that she had less than half that to spend now.

"Ericor, I really don't want to put you out. I've come here looking for something rather specific..."

"Oh? Do tell, I'm always here to cater to your whims," he murmured with a wink. She couldn't hide a smile, her eyes shimmering with honey amusement. Coming here was always an ego boost and she couldn't deny that she adored it. Still, it was distracting, which wasn't something she needed right now.

"Yes, well, I'm due to go to a charity gala in Venora on the 49th and I have a gown for that. You know the one that I bought last season-"

"Mm, a sublime creation and stunning on you, I remember," he interjected.

"-but I also have another party to go to later in the season, the masquerade for the Winter Mist Festival, and I obviously can't wear the same thing-"

"Certainly not, it'd be scandalous!"

"It's awkward though because I don't have as much money at my disposal as I'd like..." she commented hesitantly.

The man held up his hands.

"Say no more! I understand that the city is expensive and of course, a lady of your beauty and refinement requires truly spectacular outfits, which aren't cheap," he commented, eyeing her current rather humble outfit a little sadly. It wasn't her fault that things were so expensive. She couldn't be expected to flounce around the place in her best clothing! However, there was still nothing wrong with the blouse or skirt that she wore; they were well-fitted. "I have some more simplistic but stunning pieces although I'm sure you can manage to stretch your purse a little bit all the same," he added with a chuckle, moving off before she could say anything more.

With a sigh, the blonde put a hand to her face, covering her eyes as she imagined what obscenely expensive items he was going to bring back. No doubt, his idea of a "budget" piece would still be enough to bankrupt the monarchy. Still, there was no harm in looking. Perhaps she could even try some things on and come back when she had the nel for them. If she had the nel for them.

The man padded back to her, the swishing sound of fabric heralding the dresses that he'd brought with him. When she raised her gaze, she gasped at the sight of cloth in rich purples, reds and golds, with lace and bead work and floating bits of gossamer that she knew she couldn't possibly afford but Valeria still drank in the sight hungrily all the same. Surely, she could go without food, it wouldn't be the first time that she'd done it and then... No there was no way she could afford any of them. She was eyeing silk and satin, both fabrics that were extraordinarily expensive and in those colours...
she shuddered at the idea of the price tag. He'd brought a black velvet dress as well and was now arraying them before her, but even the velvet would be too much, especially as it wasn't plain. The beauty and luxury of them, so close and yet impossibly out of reach made her want to cry. Perhaps she could do something for the man to make him knock off most of the cost.

No, she didn't even think that a few breaks with her would suffice to lessen the cost enough.

The bell tinkled again, earning swift looks from both owner and customer.

"Lord Gawyne! A pleasure to see you although I certainly don't see you nearly enough," the man purred, shuffling fabric aside so he could be free to properly greet the man.

Valeria let out a gasp of both surprise and delight, rising hastily from her seat to move to greet him. It would require a slight stretch but she would plant a kiss on each cheek if she could and clasp his hands as she laughed delightedly.

"Caius Gawyne! You sly dog! When did you return from Viden? If you tell me that it's been more than a season, or the Seven forbid, a cycle, then I'll have you know that I'm probably going to slap you," she teased, her gaze like molten gold. Obviously she knew that they had a witness but she didn't care. What was a little familiarity between friends after all?
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[Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

Zi'da 31, 717


Zi'da had slipped through his fingers like so much molten lead, like sheets of fine paper caught in the wind. It was a blur of work, studies, and far too many emotional moments for the young Gawyne, and yet he somehow felt as though he should be happy to still be alive and that his face had not been bruised for well over two ten-trials now. It was a strange accomplishment to be proud of, truly, but that was simply how the season had gone.

It was still going, of course, and now that he'd returned from Bellesoir again, Oliver Venora's Charity Gala was looming on the cold, snowy horizon. He'd have to dress well for that, considering it was most likely the event where all of Andaris would see that his relationship with Darcyanna Venora was far more than just casual association.

It helped to look well for such rumor-conquering, bold announcements, Caius decided, but his problem was, as always, time. He never sarding had enough of it.

Finally, after another long, dizzying lecture on the theoretical link between Immortals and the Emea, one in which his professor had rabbit trailed into a very strange conversation about how the Immortals did not at all have real bodies despite occasionally appearing with them but instead could quite literally appear however they liked, the northern noble slipped away from Rynmere University's campus with what money he had left for the season and made his way—alone—into mid-town proper toward Ericor's Elegance to see what he could have tailored to his somewhat lanky person and ready in time for the Gala.

The weather was finally something even the young Gawyne could call chilly, and as he walked the snowy streets, his too busy mind turned over his lecture notes, which he wrote down more because of the habits of his upbringing than because he actually needed to. Of course no one had truly sat down with an Immortal to ask them some of the more burning questions academia tended to have about their existence, or, at least, if they had, they had yet to share. Caius was aware that an Immortal had some sort of biological physiology, if only because his grandfather was proof and because he'd been to Viden where Yvithia walked among her people. He knew that they could more than enjoy the bodies of mortals like everyone else as well as produce children by such a union—mortal born, they were called. His grandfather, the Duke, looked as though he hadn't aged in decades, a hardy man who kept many of his half-mortal secrets to himself lest those who would rise against him know too much. While he was flesh and bone, it seemed as though Ziell, the Immortal, couldn't be contained in a single mortal body but instead could create an avatar, a conduit.

He'd never met an Immortal personally, of course, but Caius assumed that it would be easy to mistake them for someone far less powerful when seen to be moving in mortal skin. It was easy enough to see his grandfather move through life in Fort Gawyne and navigate the political landscape and forget that Immortal existence mingled in his blood—in Caius' as well.

A hand strayed listlessly to his left wrist at the thought, the small white-ink numbers of his birthday forever tattooed under his skin as a reminder of the end he sometimes heard whispered in his thoughts. Sharp blue eyes came back into focus as he passed Ericor's shop, cursing under his breath in a cloud of warm fog, before he turned and entered. A bell jingled and the proprietor looked up at him from a stack of fabric, greeting him with his roguish smile and smooth, elegant voice,

"Good trial to you, too, ser Edderick." The northern noble returned, smirking at the man's comment. No, shopping was not at all his strength or his preference as parties and social events were far out of the scholarly Gawyne's comfort zone. This time, however, he had very little choice, considering the host of this Gala was none other than Darcyanna's brother. He opened his mouth to say more, gaze washing over the room and falling on Valeria Burhan. The flutter of recognition that filled his chest was warm, but it spread like a blush across his aquiline cheeks once she was up and greeting him with more than just words, which he hesitated to return,

"Ah, Lady Burhan. How good to see you again—" Caius' smile was still genuine and he gave her hands a gentle squeeze. They'd known each other for arcs now and all that had passed between them did not feel awkward so much as distant, perhaps more so with a certain blonde Venora heavily on his mind,

"—dog? Me? Please, my Lady! That's Smudge, I'm afraid. And a good dog he is where I am not, but you know this too sarding well, don't you? I've been back from Viden for less than a cycle, it's true. Since Ymiden, actually." He may have visibly winced, body tensing as if to prepare to ward of an actual threat of a slap, far too skittish about the motion of people's hands towards violence after all that had transpired towards his face in the season thus far, "But please, V, forgive me for not knowing you were also in Andaris, else perhaps we could have run into each other sooner. I'm going to venture to guess you're here shopping for a particular event?"

Caius grinned at her knowingly, his sly expression revealing he, too, was in Ericor's shop for the same reason. Unconcerned that they shared personal space in the proprietor's viewing, far too familiar a friend with the Burhan, he did finally release her hands and run ink-stained fingers over the fabric of his vest, returning to a more proper position of formality between the two of them, not wanting to cause any more confusion than necessary. Had Darcy been with him, surely she would have been confused, but he harbored little guilt over the history between himself and the Lady who now shared the shop with him,

"Oliver Venora's Charity Gala, is it? I made those posters, you know. I'm here for the same reason, to be honest." Caius chuckled, his expression revealing just how much he sarding hated shopping and parties all in the same curl of his lip, "It appears we can catch up while we shop, then, which for me will make this experience far more pleasant."

Ericor laughed, keenly watching the two with curiosity, before he returned to sorting fabrics for the Lady. Caius was aware he'd have to wait his turn, though the man did begin to ask him questions even while he moved toward Valeria with an armful of fabric choices to present to her,

"Well, my lady, here we go ..."
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[Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

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Her full lips pouted a little at his initial formality, not that she ever tired of hearing her own title, but it seemed off, especially given how she'd greeted him. Still, he quickly returned the smile to her face, the young woman laughing musically as he talked about his dog. She also noticed his slight wince at the mention of slapping, something that she noted with interest and mild amusement; she'd had no idea that she could possibly intimidate him.

"Oh yes, he's certainly a better dog than you. Possibly more handsome too," she teased, reaching up to pat him lightly on the cheek. "All the same, I wouldn't sully your face, Lord Pretty Boy, don't worry. I never went anywhere, or at least not often or for very long. You know how I hate to be out of the loop for any length of time and Burhan is very much out of the loop," she pointed out with a sly smile.

The topic of why she was there drew a laugh from her, a particular shade of blue entering her gaze that he'd be able to identify as anxiety. Oh, she could look away to try to hide it but what would be the point? After all, if he was going to remain in the shop with her, her lack of funds weren't going to remain a secret for long. At least, she could trust him not to spread it around that she was in something of dire straits, or she hoped so anyway. Besides, it wouldn't be for long. She could pull in some money from work and then she'd be able to spend to her heart's content. Although perhaps it would be better if she curbed her spending a bit. After all, it was what had allowed her to get into this dilemma in the first place. But there were pretty things to buy and she had to keep herself in nice accessories. Really, she was her own worst enemy.

"Actually, no, I'm not shopping for the gala. I have the dress I'm going to wear for that. However, I have every intention of going to the masquerade for the Winter Mist Festival. As much as I like the gown, I can't wear it twice. That would be... well, it would be too awful to bear. I can imagine the rumours that would circulate. I have a certain image to maintain you know, although I might well cause some rumours with the dress I'm wearing to the gala anyway," she added with a giggle.

"Oh yes, you'll definitely set tongues wagging," the shop owner commented, glancing up briefly to smile knowingly. A slight bit of colour came to her cheeks.

"In any case, I do need to attire myself properly but try not to enjoy yourself too much while I shop, all right?" Valeria added with a laugh, watching as Ericor descended on her with swatches of material. "Your work on the posters was lovely by the way. Very elegant. Oh my!"

"Now I know that you have a fine eye so just choose some that you like and I'll show you an array of dresses that might appeal to your tastes."

Although she couldn't afford them, she couldn't resist running her fingers over some of the more expensive fabrics, a look of unconcealed longing on her face. "I really do need to be careful with my purse, dear. It isn't as big of a deal as the gala though so perhaps... something made of organza? It'd be lighter, more suited to dancing, and perhaps more of a dress and less of a gown. It doesn't have to be floor-length or ostentatious. Simple is fine," she remarked reluctantly, noting the slight horror on the man's face which he quickly concealed with disappointment.

"Well, I'm sure that I can show you some things. There certainly wouldn't be any harm in looking at some finer dresses though, or even trying them on. You know that you can't resist if you try them on," he commented, throwing the last over his shoulder as he bustled off.

"Yes, that would be the problem," she responded quietly, only loud enough for Caius to hear. She went back to her seat, beckoning for the other noble to join her. She sat with her ankles crossed, eyeing the wine that Ericor had poured her before she finally gave in and took a sip, eyes closing in pleasure as she tasted it. "So how was Viden, Caius? And what have you been doing with yourself since you got back? Have you managed to find entertaining company in the city? Any... lady friends?" Valeria asked with a coy smile and a suggestive waggle of her eyebrows. She laughed lightly.

Ericor returned with a purple organza gown, which didn't look anywhere near as simple as she would have liked. It was gorgeous though and she wanted it. However, purple wasn't a cheap dye, even if she did adore it and there was quite a bit of bead work too.

"How about this, my Lady? You can make any dress look good of course, but you'd really appear spectacular in this. I can imagine it now!
However, I don't need to imagine anything when you can simply try it on,"
Ericor suggested, holding it out to her invitingly.

"Uhuh, and I think you're trying to get as much out of my purse as possible," she responded wryly.

"I assure you that it's worth less than 50 nel to you."

"Not much less, I'll warrant," she pointed out but she stood nevertheless and accepted the garment. "I shan't be long," she assured Caius as she moved to the part of the shop for changing, which was partitioned off with silk curtains.

"Of course. No lady ever takes longer than she means to in dressing," Ericor announced rather diplomatically while winking at Caius. "While we wait on Lady Burhan, shall we discuss what you came for, Lord Gawyne?"

The blonde glanced back to catch the private exchange of looks between the men and rolled her eyes at Caius, sure that he'd see the gesture whereas Ericor seemed to miss it.
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[Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

"Better looking? I sarding think not."

Caius mocked offense with a lopsided smile and a calloused riposte, listening to Valeria admit she'd been in Andaris almost the entirety of his needful absence in Viden under the guise of studying abroad. He watched the shift in the color of her irises and heard the tension in her laugh over his question, which only made the ever knowledge hungry Gawyne more curious instead of less. He did his best not to roll his eyes as the Lady Burhan went on about dresses and how much of a grievous offense it was to wear the same sarding gorgeous cut of material more than once in the sight of her peers at some other sarding social gathering—the kinds of noble issues that made his skin crawl and only fueled his desire to stay out of as many social gatherings as possible.

Ericor chimed in supportively, causing Caius' expression to fade into an unamused smirk, "But if you look good in something, why only wear it once?" He was quite guilty of repeating outfit choices, but he was also a working class student these trials instead of just another noble living off of the generosity of his parents. They did not currently support his more creatively focused studies, despite just how hard he worked to also make sure his academic pursuits included more the more acceptable focus of Religion.

The young Gawyne laughed at her compliment, the tone of his amusement self-deprecating but not ungrateful, "Elegant. Thank you, V." He heard her again insist on simplicity and savings, and his too-busy mind turned over the implications not out of nosiness or rude curiosity so much as he was helpless to do otherwise, following each stray thought to its inevitable conclusion as he stood and watched the shop owner and the blonde Burhan continue to negotiate her budget in the most subtle of ways.

She confirmed his suspicion with her quiet side comment, and he followed though he didn't sit, hovering next to her while she sipped her wine and letting his sharp blue gaze wander the shop himself, somewhat loath to get caught up in a similar process—

"Viden? Oh, it was sarding cold, but, that's to be expected." He teased her, stating the obvious with an annoying wry grin, "Bogs! Honestly? I needed to get away from here, from everything, and so it was a nice arc. To study in a place where an Immortal walks among her people—it was sarding amazing. Also, just as difficult. But worth the suffering. I could still be there, but father wanted me closer to home and I reluctantly obeyed. That said, when I insisted on continuing my studies, he was sarding annoyed with me ... so here I am, in Andaris, working for the Rynmere Gazette and still pursuing academia and arts instead of playing all the expected political games."

Caius shrugged his narrow shoulders, ink-stained hands finding their way into the pockets of his blue velvet coat. Her next questions seemed to catch him off-guard and he bit his lip, looking away from Valeria for a bit or two,

"Entertaining company? Perhaps." The young Gawyne chuckled coyly, reluctant to answer her directly, "Lady friends? Well, a friend. Or more than friend. Yes. By accident, I'll admit, and it's probably a story you'd enjoy, I'm sure. I—" It was clear by the warmth that entered his voice that he was, indeed, quite taken with whoever he refused to name, but in spite of his voice, the pale shift in his irises gave away his worry and his personal struggle over the haunted, addicted young pianist, "—I rescued the Lady Darcyanna Venora from a couple of drunks on my way home from work in the sarding early breaks of a morning in Vhalar. We, uh, have seen quite a bit of each other since."

The expression that crept across his aquiline features along with a hint of heated color to his cheeks revealed that his last words were a thinly veiled understatement. Clearing his throat and quickly quieting as Ericor returned, Caius was more than thankful for the man's sudden distraction, standing quietly out of the way as the shop owner and Valeria continued to negotiate whatever it was she was looking for at just the right price.

Once she agreed to try something on, he nodded and watched her head toward the changing area for a trill before Ser Ederick spoke up for his attention,

"Myself? Well, I sarding well never know what I'm looking for, but I'd prefer something in my House colors—"

"As always." Ericor teased him, aware of the young Gawyne's penchant for representing his homeland by his clothing choices. It didn't bother him in the least considering purple-dyed items were far more expensive than most other colors. He reached out to thumb the lapel of Caius' jacket thoughtfully, hand traveling over the material toward his bicep in thought, "Hmm. This velvet is nice, yes? Very seasonal, too. You seem to wear it well, my Lord. Since you don't have any ideas of your own, would you rather trust my, how shall I say it, vision? Or would you rather me show you a few pieces as examples and you customize from there?"

He cast a wary glance toward the changing area, quite aware that he could fall victim to trying on far too many options of outfits should he make the wrong choice with his answer to this question. Ink-stained fingers curled into his unkempt hair and he considered carefully, "Let's see your vision, Ser Ederick."

"Splendid! Just wait here, my Lord." With that, the shop owner scurried off into more of his shop to find things for the young Gawyne that best exemplified whatever he had in mind.

Sarding fabulous.
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[Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

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Valeria and Caius had always gotten on rather well, almost a little too well at times, but sometimes she wondered how their friendship had ever worked when he seemed almost purposely dense about certain topics.

The blonde practically glared at him when he asked why she couldn't wear the same thing twice. Her eyes shifted from the vibrant brown of good humour to an icy blue. She sighed dramatically, a sound that wasn't put on for effect and gazed briefly at the ceiling. "Caius, I'm not saying that I can't wear the dress ever again. If it looks good then I can wear it in the future but not in the same season," she explained slowly as if speaking to a child. "Besides, I'm sure that you already own formal wear but you're here so you can't exactly judge me, can you?" she countered with a smirk, her irises shifting back to soft honey.

When he spoke of Viden, she gave an initial rather unlady-like snort at the obvious statement before settling into one of her easy smiles. There was awe when he spoke of Yvithia among her people and there was also a little wistfulness in his voice. If Ericor picked up on the talk of Immortals then he'd wisely keep his thoughts to himself; it wouldn't do to show that he was constantly eavesdropping on conversation. "Did you ever see her personally? I know she isn't... well, she isn't Zanik or Ziell but she's still an Immortal and quite a powerful one at that," Valeria murmured, sighing as her gaze grew in intensity.

The young woman couldn't deny that she hungered to see Zanik again but then how could she not? Still, the opportunity to see any Immortal in the flesh would be a joy to her. Her fascination and admiration of them had always been a little too strong considering her position in society. Bogs, the fact that she not only worshipped Zanik but had been marked by him as well was sufficient to have crossed the line. What was a little curiosity and respect in the face of that?

There was only one thing that could have truly drawn her attention away from inner musings on her favoured Immortal and that was the talk of love lives. She was always incredibly nosy when it came to what others got up to in their intimacies and she enjoyed a bit of gossip as much as the next girl. All she had to do was listen to Caius' voice and she could tell that he was thinking of one woman in particular and that he obviously had some regard for her. At Darcy's name, her finely arched brows rose, lips parting a little but she quashed the first thing that wanted to cross them. Instead, she simply commented, "How very noble of you!" Internally, she puzzled over that one, wondering how to respond to this piece of news.

Suppose the pair showed up to the gala together and she bumped into them, a highly likely occurrence. If she said nothing of her acquaintance with the lovely Venora and then showed familiarity when they met, the Gawyne might draw the wrong conclusion and think that her earlier silence had been a sign of her disapproval. Truthfully, her hesitation had more to do with herself understandably given that she was her own favourite topic and primary concern. She couldn't ignore the fact that she'd felt some attraction to the pianist, although that might have as much to do with her infatuation of the Venora family as a whole. Still, it was awkward given that herself and Caius had history, and now it turned out, she was slightly enamoured with the idea of his girlfriend. He certainly didn't need to know that. That didn't mean that he missed the colour that entered her cheeks or the mix of silver and violet that slipped into her gaze in her perturbed and oddly hurt state.

The blonde continued to dwell on the matter while she changed, allowing the various layers she was wearing to drop to the floor so she could step into the ruffled dress over her corset and the rest of her undergarments. Valeria had wisely remembered to wear the constricting garment, knowing that she'd want to wear it to the event itself. What was the point of trying on a dress over her natural figure after all if she planned on altering it? Better to see it as it would look on the night.

Once on, she smoothed down the material and regarded herself critically in the mirror. She had nothing against purple, loved it in fact but she wasn't sure that she wanted to go wearing it to the masquerade. She was probably better off wearing her house colours. It wasn't as if they didn't suit her; most colours suited the blonde very well, except for yellow, which tended to look sickly on her. Still, she stepped from the curtained off area, padding across on stocking-clad feet so that the two men could admire her. Even if she had no intention of buying it, she could still show herself off in it.

When she appeared, Ericor seemed to have vanished again, no doubt fetching items for the young Gawyne. If she came out in a sack, the shop owner would declare her as being radiant, provided that there was a fair few gold nel in it for him. She might get a more honest opinion from Caius and she might receive some honest admiration as she felt was her due. She spun on the spot, the arcs of curtseying and having to maintain her balance, allowing her to move gracefully so that the ruffled skirt fanned around her.

"It's lovely but I'm thinking that blue might be better. I might as well represent Burhan if it's a masquerade as I'm sure it'll be a complete mystery who I am otherwise," she told him sarcastically, laughing at her own joke. She grew a little more serious as she rested against the side of her recently vacated chair, eyeing her companion with soft hazel orbs. "I've met Darcy, you know. We worked together earlier in the season. She seems lovely, quite beautiful although she appears to have a low opinion of her own self-worth. You seem quite taken with her. Do you think it's serious or is it too early to tell?" she questioned softly. She laughed to dispel some of the seriousness although the effect didn't reach her eyes as she softly teased, "At least one of us should have the chance to marry a pretty Venora, don't you think?"

Ericor reappeared with a number of neatly folded pieces, all of which seemed to be in a dark purple. As she'd expected, he went into raptures at the sight of her, earning a soft smile and an eye roll from the blonde although she was truly very pleased indeed.

"Does she not look sublime, Lord Gawyne? And in your house colours too!" he commented with a sly look as his eyes flitted between the two of them. Oh boy, she didn't need him jumping to conclusions. She didn't think that he was one to gossip, it might be bad for business, but it would be a juicy rumour to unleash into the noble wilds of Rynmere. Best to dispel any notion in his head before it was too late.

"Yes, it is lovely, Ericor but not what I'm looking for. I'm thinking blue, dark blue perhaps and shorter, a dress rather than a gown. Having a loose skirt is nice but perhaps keep it above the knee? Although then I really have to choose shoes with care because everyone will see them," she explained, the last more of a murmur to herself.

The man's face lit up. "I have just the thing! And if you like it - I'm sure you'll adore it - then I can find you some shoes to match. One moment!"

"I have the odd feeling that I'm going to greatly regret this," she commented wryly. "Anyway, best get your clothes off, Pretty Boy." She winked at him.
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[Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

Caius couldn't help but snicker at the exasperation his purposefully pretend ploy at an ignorant response dragged out of the Burhan, her dramatic sigh amusing to the northern noble who found such pretenses more than just a little irritating, "I don't own much as I do my sarding best to keep away from parties with our kind. That said, this one, well, I really don't have a choice. I'm not judging, I promise."

Caius smiled, ink-stained hand straying to trail fingers listlessly over the back of his neck at her curiosity about Viden. The pair at least shared an understanding, a separatist tension from strict adherence to Rynlist tenants, both quite aware that yes, sometimes the Immortals actually did care about the mortals of Idalos and actually stepped into their lives in the most unexpected of ways. While Rynlism revered their clever, powerful mortal ancestors who were worthy of the worship they received, there was more to the story and at least both of them felt as though, in their own ways, knew of it. He shook his head at her question,

"In person? No. I didn't seek her out, but I did catch a glimpse of Ziell once—just a peek—in Ashan last arc—did you know he comes to visit the city and has his own holiday? Sarding amazing." The young Gawyne made no effort to keep his voice down or hide his enthusiasm for the conversation, a passionate academic when it came to the subjects he was actually pursuing with purpose and effort, "Her hand in the city is far from invisible, to be honest."

But then she caught him, her questioning that led to him speaking of a particular Venora and the emotions that played themselves across his features, in his eyes, and even in the tone of his voice. Caius noticed quite clearly that his words made Valeria grow silent, thoughtful, far from ignorant of their history. She almost appeared to have something to say and he almost considered saying something more, fumbling through an excuse to smooth things over despite the truth that there was no shame or hurt feelings between himself and the Lady Burhan, their friendship apparently comfortable enough to allow for interesting expressions of such, "Noble? I suppose."

Stupid, too, but she hadn't said that. Would she have?

His eyes faded, paled to a duller blue, and he watched her and Ericor interact over dresses and fabric, the blonde Elithem finally allowing herself to be convinced to try something on. Disappearing from view behind the curtain, Caius let his fingers fiddle indecisively with the polished buttons of his vest, glancing around the clothing store as if attempting to find inspiration for himself before he allowed the shop owner complete and total free reign over his dressing style for the Gala, unable to convince himself that he cared either way. He would be there out of obligation more than enthusiasm, there because of Darcy and present for Oliver, already aware that he would be allowing himself to be seen in public with the Lady Venora as more than just an accessory—their relationship wouldn't be a secret.

Valeria reappeared while Ericor was ferreting the perfect selection of fabrics for the young Gawyne and she couldn't help but give him a somewhat private viewing of the dress. Grinning at her, he shrugged his narrow shoulders at her opinions,

"If you're wanting to represent your House, you know you're going to have to sarding wheel Ser Edderick back in from the depths he's swimming. He's just going to keep sailing farther from shore, of course." Caius teased her, both about the shop keeper's eccentric nature and how his pricing could end up out of control without proper discipline. Her serious words stole his smile and made his chest tighten, one hand straying towards his mouth for him to chew on an ink-stained nail before answering. The truth was that the knowledge-hungry northern noble had in some ways already made some decisions in his mind despite the relatively short amount of time he'd known Darcyanna,

"This isn't the place to speak of her feelings about herself, and while I have comments, they aren't for ... here. Let's suffice to say that I'm doing what I can for all of that." A mix of emotions churned in his irises—Darcy's secrets were not ones he felt like sharing with Lady Burhan. Not here. Not now. Perhaps not ever. His words were protective, guarded, and a surprising response from the young Gawyne whose tone would be familiar to Valeria as if he was speaking of his sister, Ivy. He sighed, glancing to see where Ericor was and what he was busy with, her words touching places he hadn't expected them to touch,

"I'm quite taken with her, yes. More than I should be, perhaps, but I don't have any regrets. Am I serious? Between us, V—promise me this is between us—" Caius lowered his voice, dragging a palm roughly across his face as if to wipe the obvious infatuation from it, as if to keep the smile that tugged hesitantly at his aquiline features from fully taking over his face. He failed, irises warming to a bright near-amber hue, "—between us, yes, I'm sarding serious. That kind of serious."

The committed kind. He'd just never said it out loud before, and it showed. Caius looked away with his words—looked everywhere in the small shop than at the blonde Elithem's face, blushing furiously.

Thank the Fates Ericor appeared then, far too enraptured by Valeria looking gorgeous in whatever article of clothing she put on, arms in the air appreciatively as he teased the young Gawyne about the colors she wore, eliciting a smirk from him,

"I appreciate the sentiment, but I'm far below my Lady Burhan's station despite our similar titles. She would never choose to marry down to a Gawyne." Caius winked teasingly at her, letting V explain her desires again to the clothier, crushing the man's dreams one syllable at a time. She seemed to be attempting to save some coin, which the printer's diri understood now that he was living on his own, far from home and without the financial support of his Barony. Ser Ederick appeared to understand her, though he wasn't entirely any more convinced than she was.

Turning his attention to the fabrics laid out by the other man, Caius let ink-stained fingers wander over the selections, creative sensibilities consuming the varying shades of purple as well as the types of fabrics offered him. As Ericor fled gleefully toward the dresses again and Valeria taunted him in return, he mocked a sneer and reached for the buttons of his vest without hesitation,

"Nothing you haven't sarding seen before now is it, V?" He laughed, obviously willing to bury all of the honesty he'd just laid at her feet about Darcyanna with what could only be described as their rather comfortable history. Aware of just how inappropriate his comment was, the northern noble was far from shy about being so crass, though he also knew he'd have to subject himself to Ericor's measurements as it'd been several seasons since he'd bothered to actually go shopping for much of anything, especially here. Rolling his eyes, he set his vest on the chair the blonde Elithem was leaning on and slipped out of his well-worn, knee-high boots,

"Your purse may have more regrets, honestly, but it's not like Ser Ederick doesn't know what he's doing. Not that he needs to make much effort for you, however." Caius complimented her generously as if to make up for his wickedness, finding their familiarity a selfishly needful relief when somewhere he didn't really want to be.

Ericor returned with a dress in his arms, his bright eyes straying to the less dressed and ready for his attention young Gawyne,

"Ah, the Seven have blessed me! It's good to see you know what you're doing here, my Lord." He all but purred, waggling eyebrows in a way that was somewhat unexpected before offering Valeria what he had in his arms, "Do please try this on, my Lady, while I tend to our other guest here."
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[Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

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The young woman snorted softly. "You not judge somebody, Caius Gawyne? I must say that I've heard it all now!" she teased, a sly grin on her face. She knew that he wasn't the most sociable of people, or at least, he didn't like all the airs and graces that accompanied the sorts of social events that nobles attended. He didn't like to play the game or meet all those expectations. Each to their own although she enjoyed it to some degree.

"Ziell? Is he the one that you're related to?" she questioned, unsure if she was remembering that correctly. She thought Ivy had mentioned it once and she felt like that was correct. Ziell was the only other Immortal that she knew that began with Z aside from Zanik and she was fairly sure that that was a connection she'd drawn at the time. That didn't mean that she had it right of course. The blonde knew that such pieces of information could easily slip her mind without too much trouble.

When she appeared in the purple dress, she was more than a little disappointed that Caius didn't offer any opinion on her actual appearance. It made her pout a little but she supposed that it was understandable. If his attitude when he'd mentioned Darcy was anything to go by then he wasn't really able to see other women in the same way anymore. Even if he wasn't attracted to Valeria, he should have still been able to tell whether or not she was attractive. Instead, he made an allusion to the price tag that Ericor was likely to land on if she didn't rein him in and she couldn't deny that it was helpful advice. The Burhan could only try her best but she intended to be highly persistent. It wasn't a matter of desire after all, she truly couldn't afford to spend very much.

When she commented on Darcy, she was interested to see how protective he grew as he alluded to some deeper causes to her sense of self-worth. It was a tone reminiscent of one she'd heard him use when talking about Ivy. It wasn't clear if the Venora had gone through a similar experience to Caius' younger sister or if there was some other incident with similarly unfortunate consequences. Either way, it was obvious that she wasn't supposed to pry so she remained quiet on the matter, only perking up when she saw the change in his demeanour. She pressed her fingers to her mouth, more in surprise than in an attempt to hide the growing smile on her face.

"Oh! I see!" she responded in a hushed tone. "Well, I never thought I'd see you so enamoured. I certainly didn't expect to see you willing to settle down before me," Valeria added with a soft laugh although their was a hint of blue sadness in her eyes. The blonde didn't know if she was ever going to feel about someone the way that the Gawyne felt about Darcy. Sometimes, the noblewoman wondered if that sense of feeling was broken in her. Perhaps that was why she was so willing to seduce anyone or feel fleeting lust for others without any other sort of emotions attached. It was safe to say that the young man was very much in love whereas Valeria wondered if her own heart was dead.

When Ericor returned, there was to be no more talk of these matters. This was definitely the sort of information that the man would happily leak to noble society at large, especially as someone must have seen Caius and Darcy together; he wasn't necessarily traceable to him alone. As for this joke about Caius and Valeria... well, it could be easily brushed aside before any harm could come of it. Although as he began to undress before her, she found herself blushing a little, more from how this could be perceived rather than the act itself. After all, he made a very good point; there was nothing about his body that could offer her any surprises. She had to laugh but there was a nervousness to it.

"You're truly awful, Caius. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised given the state you were in when you originally introduced yourself to me. You've no shame or sense of decency," she countered with a falsely indignant huff, the warm brown of her eyes giving away the falsity. She allowed her gaze to drift to the fabrics that the clothier had left with the young nobleman as he mentioned the regrets that her purse might have. "Oh, it wouldn't just be my purse that'd have regrets. Although you don't seem to have such worries. You must be flush with nel unlike some of us," the Burhan admitted softly, grimacing a little at the thought of her own money problems. "I'll come into more soon, I hope but... probably not before the Winter Mist Masquerade," she added with a forlorn sigh as Ericor appeared bearing a stunning dark blue dress with lovely white lace on it. It was enough to sending her sighing again, the longing in her face obvious for both men to see.

"Oh, Ericor! It's really lovely!" she said in an awed whisper, her eyes shining with moisture as if she was about to cry.

"It is gorgeous, isn't it? It's a... a bargain as well," the man explained, almost choking on 'bargain' as if it was incredibly distasteful to him. The blonde took the offered dress, practically cradling it in her hands as she regarded it lovingly.

"Oh yes, I'm sure it's a real bargain," she remarked dryly as she moved off to the changing curtain again. She glanced back over her shoulder at Caius with a wry smile.

"Well, I shudder to say it but... less than 20GN," Ericor stated as he moved to measure the young lord. Still looking back, the blonde winced. The clothier would miss it but Caius wouldn't. She looked back at the dress with longing and slipped out of sight.

The old dress was slipped off with ease, reverently set aside while she moved to handle the new one. She stroked it lovingly, enjoying the feel of the cloth over her fingertips. She stepped into it, reaching back to do up the zip and then gazed at herself in the mirror. It stopped at a point above her knee and as she twirled, she watched the skirt flare out, showing off more of her stockinged legs. They were an asset that she'd always been secretly proud of but she didn't show them off anywhere near often enough. However, as lovely as it was, it meant that she'd also need nice shoes and she didn't think she could afford them. With the way things were currently going, she could have the dress or nice shoes, not both. It wasn't a fun situation to be in.

The blonde stepped lightly out onto the main floor, approaching the men with eyes slightly downcast, a crease between her brows as she puzzled over the matter.
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[Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

"Sod off." Caius riposted as V taunted him over his lack of judgement, the grin on his face no less sly,

"Ziell, yes, my great grandfather, if you will. Though I'm sure he paid me no mind in the crowd out to greet him that trial." He admitted quietly, perhaps with a not-so-hidden edge of disappointment, as if he'd genuinely wanted the attention of the Immortal when he'd barely seen the shape of his glamour on the streets of Viden, crushed by the crowd of warm bodies in the sarding cold of Ashan.

Valeria's exaggerated surprise and choice of words only served to further deepen his blush, the color spreading like fire across his pale, aquiline features and creeping down his neck. The northern noble was thoroughly embarrassed now, having admitted to things he hadn't said out loud to anyone else at all, having given life to thoughts through the use of his voice. He bit his lip, hard, and could not look at her for several bits. When he finally did, he didn't miss the shift of color in her irises, not unaware, and yet unable to find the right words to comfort her. Everything for him had been unexpected, unasked for, and yet suddenly wanted. It just hadn't been easy—it still wasn't—and yet he'd somehow decided that Darcyanna Venora was worth fighting for, even if he felt unfathomably under qualified for the task.

Frowning at her, he shrugged and attempted to dismiss her accusations, "I didn't sarding say I was settling down this moment. It's damn near half an arc until Saun and anything can happen by then—bogs. I can't believe I'm saying this out loud, either." Caius laughed, but it was bitter, confused, and he raised his ink-stained hands in flustered self-defense, in surrender, "I don't know what the Seven I'm doing, Valeria, I really don't. I just know how I feel."

Those words were hot lead on his tongue and yet his face didn't give it away as much as he could have. He watched the blonde Elithem process everything in her own way, and it seemed to him that she had somewhat of an internal struggle, a moment of questioning that he most likely couldn't have spoken to even if he wanted to. And he did. Still, the relief of a distraction between them was more than welcome, and Caius couldn't help but grin like the sarding arsehole he was at the blush that graced her own cheeks while he taunted her with undressing,

"Oh please. That was an accident. A childish mistake." He scoffed, rolling his warm emerald eyes, untucking his shirt despite the action being unnecessary. It was obviously for his own comfort at this juncture, winking cruelly while his tone shifted into something absolutely wicked and quiet, almost a husky whisper, "Everything else was on purpose, of course. And you know it. Don't even try to lecture about decency, V. You cannot. Not to me, anyway."

Caius chuckled then, having no complaints about all of the paths their friendship had wandered. He would make the same mistakes again, though they were hardly mistakes. Nor regrets, really. His grin softened and he sighed, shoulders sagging. He was sarding infatuated and it wasn't at all the comfortable feeling he made it out to be, his relationship with Darcyanna tumultuous and full of difficulties that had already felt insurmountable more than once. Pythera's torture hounded him and her addiction sought to thwart every moment of his good intentions. Her House name overshadowed him. The odds were stacked against him, and yet he couldn't help himself. The blonde Venora was worth it. He believed that with more of himself than he was willing to admit.

"Flush? Me? Wish as I may, V, I'm sarding not. My father pays for nothing—I'm on my own in Andaris since I continue to refuse to go home to Umbridge. I even live on campus." He smirked at her, though he didn't really mind, and an ink-stained hand raised to drag fingers through his perpetually unkempt hair. The young Gawyne might have listened between her words, however, and yet he chose to say nothing, turning at the rustle of fabric behind them.

Thank the Seven Ericor re-appeared and in his arms was a dress of a very pleasing shade of blue. Caius smiled at the Lady Burhan's reaction, resisting the urge to glare at the clothier's bargain declaration. The man left the lovely dress in Valeria's hands and turned his attentions on the northern noble, measuring tape out of his pocket and ready to assault him with it,

"If the Lady likes that dress, and whatever sarding else you manage to convince her she needs," the printer's diri said quietly, glancing down at the awkward moment of his inseam measurement with the hint of a scowl, "please add it to my bill, Ser Ederick—"

"Oh! Should I now, Lord Gawyne? Well, I'm very sur—"

"It's not like that. Don't get excited. Quiet." Caius hissed, dismissing the clothier's immediate assumptions about their relationship. He sighed, aware that what he was doing somewhat felt as though he was buying silence from both of them—silence from a rumor from Ericor and silence about the depths of his infatuation from Valeria, "We've been friends since we were children, the Lady Burhan and I. I'm sure I've forgotten a birth trial once or twice. Let's just keep that between us, yes?"

Confused, the other man was quiet for a few bits, but he kept measuring, jotting all of Caius' somewhat lanky numbers down with a thoughtful smirk, "Whatever my Lord Gawyne asks, my Lord shall have of me. Now, was there a fabric—oh!"

The young Gawyne was smiling and it bordered on the overly appreciative, looking past the clothier in front of him to watch Valeria re-appear in her very nice dress. Clearing his throat as if to remind himself of who he had eyes for, regardless of how unavoidable it was to admire the Lady Burhan for her looks alone. His voice was shy, telling of how she still managed to stir him in spite of himself,

"Well, V, that's quite a lovely dress, though of course it only compliments the already lovely person in it. If nel were no object, could you settle with something so stunning?" He managed to turn his question into a taunt, but it was with difficulty.

"I have just the shoes!" Ericor blurted, blubbering in his admiration and excitement, "Oh, my Lady Burhan. Perfection. One moment."

He would eventually get to the young Gawyne—perhaps even this trial—who stood there and shoved his hands into his pockets, smiling lopsidedly.
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[Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

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Valeria relished the extreme blush that she caused in her friend, delighting in his quite obvious reaction. She'd always enjoyed being able to cause the response in him, possibly because he had a tendency of acting unflustered by most things. Any opportunity to tease him was always fun and this would be particularly good ammunition for the future, although not while they remained here. She'd invite him back to her house for tea and a chat but she didn't think he'd take that the right way. Besides, even if he did have such a powerful regard for Darcy, there was still the chance that he couldn't resist the carnal temptation if they were left alone. By Zanik, she might not resist the temptation and she had the power of Elithem on her side to bolster her chances of getting what she wanted. If that occurred then Caius would probably kill her and if she survived, he'd never forgive her. Best to avoid all chance of misunderstanding in that regard.

She smirked. "You know what I meant, Caius. I wasn't talking about marriage necessarily, just that you've settled on someone," she pointed out with an eye roll before she let out a short laugh and avoided meeting his gaze. "You know because you've fallen in love." Her tone would have been teasing if she could muster it but she couldn't help being a bit more serious than usual. It made things awkward, albeit temporarily, until they could go back to their lighter banter. The present wasn't a good place for light material it seemed, but the past was always a source of mirth, especially their first meeting.

"Oh yes, very accidental. I'm sure you had no idea that I was sitting where I was. I'm sure there was no opportunity for you to bolt back the way you came," the young woman giggled, her eyes twinkling with honey amusement. "I'm positive that nothing after that was a mistake, no, because you always do precisely what you mean to do, right Caius? Also... shush," Valeria said, waggling a finger at him in mock threat. He had an excellent point about her right to lecture him about decency. They both knew that while she did a pretty fair job of appearing decent, she was quite different in private. The pair of them had had an interesting past and that was mainly due to the blonde's shunning of all characteristics that would have made her a 'good' girl. She couldn't deny that it was fun being deliciously ill behaved.

Her eyes travelled between the fabric that he was considering and his face, her eyebrows rising incredulously. "You seem to be able to afford some very expensive things for a working man. You're clearly doing better than me. I don't receive any money from home either, which might have something to do with the fact that I don't go home until I really have to," she explained, brushing a hand back through her hair. The Burhan wondered just how much money the young man had. He had quite a few items to buy after all and he wasn't showing hesitation, or trying to steer Ericor towards a cheaper option. She wished that she had his sort of resources but alas, she was ready to cry at the thought of spending a score of gold nel.

When she returned wearing the pretty dress, the two men had been talking about something but cut their conversation off abruptly. Both of them regarded her with clear admiration, even Caius who seemed to genuinely appreciate the figure she presented in the garment. His voice gave quite a bit away and she couldn't deny that she was pleased. Her cheeks took on a delicate flush as she smiled back a little shyly herself. The talk of nel made her smile fade, as she sighed. If money wasn't an object then she'd happily settle - settle! - for this dress. Even as she moped over the idea, the clothier ran off to retrieve the perfect pair of shoes.

"If money was no object then of course I'd take this dress. I mean, look at it! I can show off my legs, which look great and my breasts!" she explained, gesturing to her chest and then laughing as she realised what she was doing. "Well, can see that it looks good on me and I really like it. I know just the sort of mask that I could wear with it because I saw a gorgeous one and-"

"Here, you are! The perfect shoes! I know that a woman of your grace will have no trouble walking in them," the man announced, presenting her with a pair of dark blue heels with ribbons tied into bows at the ankles. Valeria released a squeal of delight.

"Oh! They're- And they have bows!" she exclaimed nonsensically, practically dropping into her former seat so she could put them on, fiddling with the buckles before she stood with care, turning one leg so she could get a view in profile. "Oh they're perfect! They're so lovely but I can't Ericor!"

"Of course you can, Lady Burhan. You can leave wearing them right now if you so desire. I can happily bid you a fare trial, safe in the knowledge that you're wearing the perfect ensemble," the man told her, smirking at Caius. Valeria glanced back and forth between the two men in puzzlement.

"But the cost-"

"Never mind the money! Now I'll get you your garments, Lord Gawyne," Ericor explained as he rushed off yet again, leaving the blonde to regard her friend with suspicion.

"He doesn't want to talk about money. Now either he's taken a blow to the head or you've done something. Please tell me you haven't done something or I might have to return you to Darcy in a damaged state," she warned him, her irises turning stormy grey.
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[Ericor's Elegance] Whatever the Heart Desires (Caius)

He'd said entirely too much and he had no idea what to do with himself, Ericor having his way with the measuring tape and his body, Valeria far more entertained than he should have allowed. Caius was embarrassed, and yet he really hadn't talked to anyone else about his feelings, about Darcy, about how everything had both unraveled and yet been bound back up again in less than half a sarding season. He felt so strange, so out of his element, that he couldn't help but honestly answer everything the Lady Burhan asked of him, even when she didn't directly ask it,

"I don't know if I'd use that word. Maybe I should?" When was that appropriate? When did someone know they felt love, anyway? Was that something you said before or after you were sure? The young Gawyne's expression revealed he was actually considering the logical conclusions of love as V presented it, actually trying to decide where he was in the progression of such an emotion. It was far too confusing, and his chest ached with the effort, breath cut short. He had no sarding idea what any of it meant, but he did know he'd come to find his moments without her less exciting. He also knew that his time was short—Saun was half an arc away, and if he wanted to make a decision on the formal matter, he still had time.

Did he want to marry Darcyanna Venora?

Bogs.

What was the blonde Elithem doing to him now?

Caius blinked, wishing he could blame her, wishing his distracted thoughts were her fault. But they were all his. Thank the Seven V turned to teasing him about their younger selves so he could grin at her, relieved, the shift in subject welcome enough to renew the flush to his cheeks,

"I didn't. I sarding didn't." He swore his defense when it came to whether he knew young Valeria had been in the library at Warren's End waiting for Ivy, "At sixteen, do you really think I thought anything through? By the Fates, V, I hardly did. Everything else? Well, fine. As for money, I just don't do much with it. I know how to save my coin for when I really need it, Lady Burhan—fine, shushing."

He laughed at her, watching the shift in color of her irises and aware of the chords he'd struck in her thoughts. She disappeared and left him with Ericor while she tried on the blue dress.

Caius selected fabrics and allowed the clothier to demonstrate coat lengths, choosing a longer option because it was complimentary and because it was the cold cycle, after all. The rest he left up to Ser Ederick, if only because he cared little for fashion trends or fitting in so much as playing his expected part and looking good at Darcyanna's side. He cleaned up well, and he knew it, but the printer's diri had no sarding clue how to accomplish anything fashionably successful on his own.

When Valeria emerged in the very clearly winning dress, the young Gawyne wondered if his grin gave him away, but Ericor was also quite talented at putting his expensively shoed foot in his mouth, speaking in a way that all but named the northern noble as the reason for his good will. He scurried off just in time, too, the bastard.

"I'm sarding buying your silence."

Caius purred as she threatened him, his smile wicked as he held up his ink-stained hands in defense, flustered all over again into a very unacademic, rambling mess, "You have a way with me, you know," he coughed, the double meaning intentional, "and I've said things I've told no one else to you ... about people ... Now, you've admitted to knowing my Lady Venora. Can we keep my heartfelt confessions between us for now, V? Please? I'm just ... I'm not ready. Or maybe I'm too ready. I don't know. I just ... it's on me. It's all on my coin. Old friends and favors owed. Alright?"

His smile bordered on the panicked for a moment, his heart fiercely beating in his chest. Bogs. He had too many feelings. So much had happened over the past half a season and he didn't want it all to get out of control, even if he knew in his own Gawyne sort of way exactly what he wanted, what he was going to do about it all.

It just felt a little soon. Perhaps it was just him being a fool, however.
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